What NOT To Do If Your Child Is Being Bullied At School

Bullies exist in every single school in every single country across the world. With the rise of the internet, bullying can now take many different forms, meaning young children might suffer more now than they ever did before. As a parent, you have a duty to look after and protect your child. So, what happens when you discover they are being bullied?

Firstly, there are some right and wrong things to do. Sadly, the wrong things are usually done because you act on emotion and impulse. It’s normal to do this; you feel angry that your child is suffering and you want to see consequences for the bully. However, there are certain things you definitely should never do, and here they are:

Don’t encourage your child to fight back

This isn’t a TV show or a movie where your child stands up to their bully and the whole school cheers. Telling your child to fight back – either physically or with words – could put them in more danger. It also teaches them to fight bullying with bullying, which isn’t a good lesson at all. 

What you could do is teach them to protect themselves. There are plenty of martial arts classes for kids that teach self-defence. While you don’t want your child to fight, it can help them if they know they are able to stand up for themselves. This makes them less likely to be affected by the bully, and it could actually make the bully stand down when they realise your child isn’t scared anymore. 

But, under no circumstances should you ever tell your child to hit the bully or fight them. 

Don’t go directly to the bully

Another thing some parents might do is go directly to the bully and have a word with them. You want to shout at them and threaten them with the consequences if they touch your child again. Likewise, you may want to go to their parents and do the same thing. 

Never do this; it won’t help anyone. Instead, the right thing to do is inform the school of what’s happening and get them to arrange a meeting between everyone. This gives you a chance to talk to the other parents in a formal setting. The bully can be punished, and your child isn’t put at risk. 

Don’t leave it at that

This is where a lot of parents don’t help their kids as much as they think. Going to the school and alerting them to the issue is only the first step in solving the bullying problem. You need to keep in contact with the school to ensure things are being done to solve the issue. Keep talking to your child and let them know you are always on their side. The bullying might die down for a bit, then resurface. Tell the school what’s happening and let them know any solutions aren’t working. 

The sad reality is that bullying can’t be solved overnight. But, if you work with the school, you can help them make changes that ensure your child – and every other child – never gets bullied again. 

Enjoy every minute being a mom and continue to inspire your kids!

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Jodi Carlson is a mother of 2 children, wife, and a full time product owner at a large Insurance company. She is a mom just trying to juggle a full-time job with a family life. She shares countless tips and tricks of things she has experienced first hand with her kids. As she continues to guide and teach them to become caring, sensible and responsible human beings, all while working a full time job, maintaining a home and some how still allowing for some personal time and growth. Are you a Girl Scout Leader? Along with Mom Connecting Moms, she shares her 25+ years of Girl Scout experience over at Leader Connecting Leaders , there she shares ideas and resources to help leaders who are inspiring girl leaders of tomorrow plan their troop meetings. Check out Leader Connecting Leaders .