Moral Values: Teaching Your Child to Be Honest, Truthful, and Fair

Before I share some of my experiences with teaching my kids moral values. Let’s touch on a few facts that are daunting to look at.

Did you know 40% of all lower-income parents worry that their child might have trouble with the law? Compare that to higher-income parents. Only 21% fear law troubles for their children. Now regardless of low income or high income at the end of the day someone raised in a higher income parent home can and sometimes will have trouble with the law, while children in the lower income home grow up to be successful adults with moral values to look up to.

Do you know why? I am going to take guess at the fact that it doesn’t matter how much money you make teaching children moral development that leads to them being honest, truthful and fair can be done no matter how much you make, but there are many on both sides of the income line that just don’t teach their children these value.

Today I want to go through some ideas of ways I try to teach my children these three moral values, that I hope they grow up to continue to live by.

Walk the Walk

Do you remember that old, anti-drug ad where the dad finds his kid’s stash and confronts him? What did the kid say?

“I learned it by watching you!”

There is a lesson every parent should learn from that ad. Your children watch you. They pick up on your value system subconsciously.

If you want your kids to tell the truth, don’t lie. If you want them to be fair, be fair to them. You are the first and most important example of morality your children have.

In every aspect of your life – walk the walk if you show your kids exercise is important they will see the importance of it.

Reward Good Behavior

Teaching a value system to your children isn’t only about punishing when they do wrong. You have to reward them when they do right. Rewarding good behavior also positively impacts your child’s self-esteem.

I discovered my son did better if I rewarded him for good behavior instead of punishing him when he didn’t do the things he was suppose to. We used a reward system to even start setting good habits for 2 weeks we pick 4 things to focus on and track.

Rewarding behavior doesn’t mean you have to buy them gifts. I decided I wanted my son to earn an allowance but I didn’t want to just give him the money so for each item on list he earn .25 cents which was a dollar a day if he did them all. This allowed him to be accountable to the tasks and if he didn’t do it he didn’t earn his money.

I created my own chart like the one below and printed it and put on fridge. If you don’t have the time or creativity to do so Amazon has 100s of different ones you can pick from to get started rewarding your children today.

Close Relationships Impact Morality

Your children don’t live in a vacuum. The outside world impacts their moral development. There’s only so much you can teach them on your own, and they’ll learn so much from their peers.

You can’t monitor your children 24 hours a day. They must interact with their friends and schoolmates alone to develop real-world skills.

This was one of the hardest parts of teaching my children morals is making sure whenever possible the morals they see are the things we want them to learn. Goes back to walk the walk.

For my kids those people are their grandparents

Empathy is Learned

Morality comes from the human ability to feel empathy. Empathy is a person’s ability to understand how another person feels in a given situation. It’s a complex emotion, and many adults have trouble with it.

Adults have trouble with it because the ability to display empathy is something still not taught by parents. Why? Because many parents also lack teaching.

How do you teach your children to feel empathy? The most important way is to show it. Remember, you have to walk the walk.

  • Model your interactions with others to be compassionate and kind
  • Show concern for the feelings of others
  • Talk about the feelings of others
  • Ask your child about their feelings during play

The more your children feel empathy toward others, the easier it is for them to be honest, truthful, and fair. Teaching them how to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes

Monitor Media Consumption

This one is a hard one. Even for me with all the media out there. My children would never get off their Ipads if I didn’t set a limit and restrict things.

Your children will live in the outside world. It’s impossible to keep them away from it, always has been. It’s harder now than it has ever been to monitor the media they consume.

Back when I was a kid, my parents monitored commercial television and vulgar music there was no social media or youtube, Roblox, and other ways for kids to consume media. Now, you have that plus the internet with its endless content.

Let me tell you from experience your child will pick up on values from this media. You have to limit what they consume. My son started acting like the kid from Ryan toy reviews and gamers he was watching. I had enough and learned how to limit content.

How do you do this?

  • Ensure the media they consume reflects your values
  • Use the technology to your advantage by blocking harmful media
  • Place hard limits on device time (this means you as well)
  • Discuss thoughts and feelings when consuming challenging media like news

If you don’t take control of the media your kid is consuming. Your children will replace your values with these damaging values they are watching on the media outlet they are using. The less you are involved with your children, the more they seek to form a value system based on the media they consume.

If you have a apple product, like I do you can block apps, set time limits, set down times so they cannot get on in middle night, and more. Here is a great tutorial to get you started.

Also, if you have older kids who have already been exposed to negative habits via the internet, seek professional help. You can research schools that offer intense therapeutic services to teenagers. For instance, resources like Alpine Academy reviews will give you detailed information to aid you in your decision-making. To help your teenager, you can also suggest and participate in fun offline activities like hiking or camping to cultivate positive habits. Encourage them to limit social media use and identify the triggers that contribute to their internet addiction. While it might be tougher to monitor teenagers on the internet, you can speak to them and come to an agreement.

Teaching Moral Values

Your children learn moral values by observing. Make sure you practice what you preach, and keep the lines of communication open as they develop into young adults.

There is no substitute for a parent who shows initiative with their child’s thoughts and feelings. Taking it back to the beginning I personally grew up with others who had a lot of money and today are in Jail while others who barely made it by and are now helping others working in nonprofits or in nursing. Money does not make you who you are, moral values is the starting stone of being a good person.

My sister and I share our experiences and hope to inspire or help other mothers raise responsible children. Our hope is to be a resource for the modern mother juggling child-rearing and professional responsibilities.

Join our community today for the latest products devoted to raising moral children. Also check out my sister’s children’s book below.

The Adventures To Me

Teach your Kids about integrity and values.  This beautifully illustrated book empowers kids to be nice and kind human beings.  ‘The Adventures To Me ’ is an endearing story of a little elephant on a journey to becoming the best version of “me”.

Equipped with nothing other than a colorful scooter, a backpack, and a map, the little elephant starts their “Adventures to Me”.  Along the way, meets new friends of all different backgrounds as encounters challenges, has to make choices, and learns lessons along the way.

The road to discovering the best version of “me” is paved with lessons about confidence, truthfulness, resilience and strength, respect, kindness, responsibility, accepting differences, using what you have, dreaming big, setting goals, and looking ahead towards the future with a positive mindset.

For the little elephant, the journey of life is full of a wealth of possibilities –– ready to embark on a beautiful journey alongside our elephant friend?

Learn about the choices we all make to be good people and explore the great “Adventures To Me”!

Enjoy every minute being a mom and continue to inspire your kids!

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Jodi Carlson is a mother of 2 children, wife, and a full time product owner at a large Insurance company. She is a mom just trying to juggle a full-time job with a family life. She shares countless tips and tricks of things she has experienced first hand with her kids. As she continues to guide and teach them to become caring, sensible and responsible human beings, all while working a full time job, maintaining a home and some how still allowing for some personal time and growth. Are you a Girl Scout Leader? Along with Mom Connecting Moms, she shares her 25+ years of Girl Scout experience over at Leader Connecting Leaders , there she shares ideas and resources to help leaders who are inspiring girl leaders of tomorrow plan their troop meetings. Check out Leader Connecting Leaders .